Monday, November 17, 2008
I am proud to report that Joe has now fully demonstrated all of the essential qualities needed to one day assume the crushing load of lineage that he must bear.; I am now convinced beyond all doubt that he will be able to take the houndy pups legacy well into the 21st century. At the last Friday night game , the Varisty and the Magnificent Seven ( 7 freshman players who have been promoted to Varsity, quite a feat for Joe who had never played organized sports before ) were running through the tunnel that the marching band creates. It had been raining for 2 days and was drizzling then, when Joe, better known in the locker room as Moose Cholak, collided with some puny cornerback, got a cleat stuck in the other kids cleats and fell down, careening out of control toward the unsuspecting trumpet section. Fortunately the Titanic did not sink but got up and ran through the tunnel of trumpets joining his teammates. The trumpet section escaped unscathed. I have never been more proud.
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5 comments:
I have never laughed so hard in my life! I have tears in my eyes and am holding my hand to my mouth trying to stifle the hysterics!
Well, being a sirer of houndy Shultz pups as I am and as you are, I join you in Joe's celebration of Shultz manhood. Often Shultz manhood involves somehow becoming entangled, falling down and inevitably roaring to the sound of trumpets. One question though: Joe and his contemporaries are clearly too young to have known Moose Cholak - so how did you get them to give him that name? This smacks of Rovianism.
Moose Cholak was an artistic embellishment of my own. He is actually known as "Shultzy" to his teammates.
I wouldn't worry. Every musician knows that trumpeters are usually short,egotistical, obnoxious boys who knows they can whoop every pansy clarinet player in town. It's good to show them what a real man is every once in a while. Joe's massiveness, however, was more suited to the sousaphone section. If he fell in, a large toot would have ejected him, then all the nerds who play the blasting beast could (and would)have asked him for his autograph. Somehow they would have produced an ink pen from a pocket protector hidden in their uniform.
Speaking as a large Toot - I would never eject Joe! Toot Toot!
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